How Palin Got On The Ticket

Handler #1
Condie Rice!

Handler #2 (with Southern Accent)
What are you, fucking nuts?

Handler #3
Palin.

All
Who?!

Handler #3
Sarah Palin. First term governor of Alaska?

The rest start to grumble…

Handler #2
Is Alaska a State?

McCain
Does she have any experience?

Handler #3
She's a renegade.

McCain (contemplative)
And she's a woman.

Handler #1
And what the hell ever happens in Alaska? Can't get into trouble up there! It's not like she's a former Mayor of Chicago…or D.C.!

A couple of the handlers chuckle.

McCain
Perfect. Call Mitt, and tell him, "better luck next time," then send him one of those gift baskets filled with candy. Make it plain, though. Remember, he's Mormon.

Handler #2
Whatever-the-hell that means. So, this Palin girl. Is she hot?

All guffaw, cackle, and slap each other on the back. Handler #2 pulls a revolver out of his pants and fires it through the ceiling. Everyone jumps with a start, then after realizing what happened go back to laughing. Cue Kenny Chesney music.

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