A day at the races

So today my family celebrated the Resurrection of Christ by going to the race track and betting on the ponies. Not too long after we got there we noticed that the elderly woman next to us had either passed out or died. Our curiosity got the best of us and we decided to poke her with a fork to see if she would move. She didn't, so we took the betting slip out of her hand and collected the five bucks she won.